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This is for Speak Out. It's a poem for what he did to me.
I'll I wanted was a friend,
someone to play with and laugh together.
We played but no laughter was together.
I was only ten,
how was I to know he was wrong.
He said "were playing doctor, haven fun"?
I wanted to cry and I wanted to get away,
but he was laughing and having fun.
Besides who would care,
who would believe me, I was only ten?
I guess I got what I wanted in the end, I also
got my soul taken and taunted with.
Not every guy is bad, just some. It took me awhile to understand that and
I
still to this day have a hard time understanding that. I'm always afraid
that I'm going to get hurt, every time I wake up every time I leave my
house.
It's not easy and I almost raped another three times, but I listened to my
heart and knew to trust only my heart.
These are real life
examples of sexual violence. Unfortunately, they are real and
happen all the time.
Jan
was raped on a date when she was 17 years old. She had known the guy for
7 months and they had been hanging out with the same group of friends,
so she never thought he could do something like that. She didn’t call
it rape for a long time because she said, "I always thought rape
was something that was done by a stranger…I didn’t know it was
called rape if it was someone you knew."
Carol,
a 15 year-old high school student, is harassed by a group of seniors as
she walks to school every day. They wait for her at the school’s
entrance and make sexual comments to her as she passes by. "All my
friends say it’s not a big deal and that I should be happy that a
group of seniors are paying attention to me, but it’s really
embarrassing and I just want to hide my body," says Carol.
Terry
was in her first semester at college, excited to finally be on her own
and making her own decisions. So when her Biology professor insisted she
be his assistant, because she was doing so well in his class, Terry was
honored to help. He also said he would give her extra credit. When they
were alone in his office one day, the professor started coming on to her
and told her he would make sure she got an "A" if she gave him
a blowjob.
When Lisa
was 16 years old and went to her prom with her friend’s brother. Later
the two went to a party and had a lot to drink. She and her date began
kissing. After a while, he began touching her. She told him to stop, but he kept doing it anyway.
Her friends said she asked for it since she was drunk and kissing him.
Lisa now says, "I think it really affected me. When I started
college I was scared to date or get too close to any guy."
Tom was
a 16-year-old student who was being tutored for a challenging math
class. Sometimes, his tutor, who had been recommended by a family
friend, would say things that made him feel very uncomfortable. It also
seemed to Tom that the tutor would often "accidentally" brush
her breasts up against him. While it never went further than this, Tom
still has difficulty trusting new people. He says, "Back then, I
just thought that I was the one with the problem and that what
happened shouldn’t have bothered me the way that it did. Now I know it
wasn’t my fault."
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